Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Stubborn Baby
Last week I underwent an external version to try to turn Juliet from breech to head down. As I explained, it wasn't successful. That same night she did a lot of twisting and turning, and we were hoping that she had finished turning herself the rest of the way all on her own. I had my weekly OB/GYN appointment on Thursday, and the doctor I saw wasn't able to determine whether or not she was breech. Juliet likes to keep everyone guessing! Unfortunately, an ultrasound on Friday morning showed that she was indeed still breech. What a tremendous letdown.
I am now scheduled for a planned c-section this coming Monday morning. In six days (or less, if I happen to go into labor before then), Juliet will finally be here! I'm still attempting all the at-home methods to try to get her to turn, but I have mostly resigned myself to the fact that she's going to enter the world the exact opposite of how I was hoping. Some babies do turn last minute, but the percentage of babies that turn on their own after a failed external version is extremely low. I'm not holding out much hope.
I'm struggling with a mixture of bitterness and disappointment with the whole ordeal right now. Yes, a healthy baby is the most important thing. Yes, a c-section may not be the end of the world. No, not every pregnancy ends exactly how we want it to. Maybe it's just my hormones, but I am incredibly sick of hearing cliches such as these, even if they are meant to be encouraging and well-meaning. I get that people don't always know what to say, but implying that I don't want what's best for my baby or that I'm overreacting is incredibly offensive. I'm entitled to my feelings.
I think the biggest reason the idea of a c-section is so hard for me is because I set my sights on trying for an all-natural labor and delivery. I was induced and had an epidural with Evie, and it was the best thing for the both of us at the time. But since this is my last pregnancy, I really wanted to experience the whole process the way nature intended, without any medical interventions. Or at least give it my best effort. See what I was capable of. A c-section is the exact opposite of all of that. And that's a hard thing to accept, knowing I'll never have that experience to look back on.
However, I am trying to focus on the positive as much as possible, and trying not to let how Juliet enters the world completely taint the excitement of her birth. I can't wait to see who she looks like, how much she weighs, if she has any hair. I'm looking forward to that sweet baby smell, bonding during breastfeeding, seeing Evie as a big sister. After a journey that began almost two years ago, the light at the end of the tunnel is finally drawing near. I can't wait!
I am now scheduled for a planned c-section this coming Monday morning. In six days (or less, if I happen to go into labor before then), Juliet will finally be here! I'm still attempting all the at-home methods to try to get her to turn, but I have mostly resigned myself to the fact that she's going to enter the world the exact opposite of how I was hoping. Some babies do turn last minute, but the percentage of babies that turn on their own after a failed external version is extremely low. I'm not holding out much hope.
I'm struggling with a mixture of bitterness and disappointment with the whole ordeal right now. Yes, a healthy baby is the most important thing. Yes, a c-section may not be the end of the world. No, not every pregnancy ends exactly how we want it to. Maybe it's just my hormones, but I am incredibly sick of hearing cliches such as these, even if they are meant to be encouraging and well-meaning. I get that people don't always know what to say, but implying that I don't want what's best for my baby or that I'm overreacting is incredibly offensive. I'm entitled to my feelings.
I think the biggest reason the idea of a c-section is so hard for me is because I set my sights on trying for an all-natural labor and delivery. I was induced and had an epidural with Evie, and it was the best thing for the both of us at the time. But since this is my last pregnancy, I really wanted to experience the whole process the way nature intended, without any medical interventions. Or at least give it my best effort. See what I was capable of. A c-section is the exact opposite of all of that. And that's a hard thing to accept, knowing I'll never have that experience to look back on.
However, I am trying to focus on the positive as much as possible, and trying not to let how Juliet enters the world completely taint the excitement of her birth. I can't wait to see who she looks like, how much she weighs, if she has any hair. I'm looking forward to that sweet baby smell, bonding during breastfeeding, seeing Evie as a big sister. After a journey that began almost two years ago, the light at the end of the tunnel is finally drawing near. I can't wait!
Thursday, November 1, 2012
External Version Experience
Last week I mentioned that Juliet was breech. We were hoping she would turn on her own again, as she had been routinely doing so off and on for a few weeks, but otherwise I had an appointment lined up to discuss trying to turn her manually. On Monday morning she was still breech so I went to see a Maternal Fetal Specialist for a consultation. A lot of women have a choice to make when finding out their babies are breech, and I want to share my experience and my thoughts about it all.
The ultrasound and consultation showed that I was a good candidate for an external version, and even though the chances of her turning from breech were only 50/50, I was willing to give it a shot. If it wasn't successful, then at least I had been proactive in trying to avoid a c-section. The procedure has to be done at a hospital in case there are complications, and although it felt like everything was moving so fast, they were able to fit me into the schedule that same evening.
Michael and I arrived at the hospital a couple of hours before the procedure was going to take place. It was a bit of a whirlwind with what felt like a million people asking me for my medical history and all this activity going on around me. Because a version can be painful and the best chances of success occur when a mom is completely relaxed, I had an epidural put in. Let me just say the experience is a lot different when you aren't distracted by the pain of labor. I barely even remember getting my epidural with Evie, and the whole process felt pretty easy and painless--this time around, I was a ball of nerves and it seemed like it took FOREVER. I was also given a shot of Terbutaline to relax my uterine muscles.
Once I was numb, the doctor started the version. Basically, he used the images on an ultrasound screen to help him try to manually manipulate Juliet into turning. It's a lot of careful pushing and prodding, and I'm told by Michael that it looks very weird. I just stared at the ceiling the entire time, chanting "turn, turn" over and over in my head. I didn't feel any pain, but I could feel the pressure of her being moved around--it's a very odd sensation.
In order to get the best angles to try to manipulate her, the doctor occasionally had me roll slightly onto either my left or right side and finally onto my back. Within a minute or two of that position, all hell pretty much broke loose. Suddenly the ten plus people in my room (that is not even an exaggeration) were scrambling around, and the doctor was explaining to me that Juliet's heart rate had dropped really low and we needed to get to the operating room as a precaution. He was almost positive her heart rate would jump back up before we even got there, but he didn't want to take any chances.
Thankfully the doctor was right and the approximately three minutes it took to get me wheeled into the next room was enough time for Juliet's heart rate to come back up to normal. It was such a relief, and I'm just glad I didn't have enough time to process it all. However, although her heart rate was up, my blood pressure had dropped drastically. They had to pump a few doses of ephedrine into me before it came back up--it felt like it took forever though it probably only took a few minutes. Michael was finally in the room at this point, decked out in his paper scrubs, and I can only imagine what was going through his head.
Once both Juliet and I were stable, the doctor attempted the version once again. We stayed in the operating room for the remainder of the procedure as a precaution, but no more theatrics occurred. Unfortunately, Juliet was being completely stubborn and would not get past laying horizontally. The doctor was able to get her butt up out of my pelvis which is a huge plus, but she just wouldn't turn that last little bit to get head down. The doctor was only willing to try so long before calling it quits. No one wanted a repeat of the earlier drama.
I was wheeled back to my room shortly afterwards, and was ready to wait out the two hours of observation required to make sure both Juliet and I stayed stable after the procedure. The two hours turned into almost six as Juliet wasn't quite ready to stop being a drama queen. Apparently she's an adrenaline junkie, and the three shots of Ephedrine on top of the Terbutaline were enough to keep her heart rate high for a few hours. Poor baby went from low heart rate to high heart rate all in the same day. Thankfully after a few hours of monitoring, her heart rate finally started to slow down and eventually got back to her normal range. After nine hours in the hospital, we were finally able to go home.
It was quite an experience, and not one I'd be willing to go through again during this pregnancy. Every person on the medical staff was awesome and through all the drama and craziness of the evening, I never once lost my cool because I felt completely safe in their hands. I had one moment of pure panic on the way to the potential emergency c-section, but otherwise my nerves were steady. It's amazing what you can learn about yourself in moments of such intensity.
Although I wouldn't attempt another version this pregnancy, if I were ever to become pregnant again and was faced with this option due to a breech baby, I would consider trying it again. I'm just not willing to put my body or Juliet through that stress again so soon after going through this. Even with the heavy disappointment of going through it all and the procedure not being successful, I don't regret doing it. Especially because I am almost certain Juliet turned the rest of the way that night while I was asleep! I'll find out today at my doctor appointment for certain, but either way the whole process was quite a learning experience.
The ultrasound and consultation showed that I was a good candidate for an external version, and even though the chances of her turning from breech were only 50/50, I was willing to give it a shot. If it wasn't successful, then at least I had been proactive in trying to avoid a c-section. The procedure has to be done at a hospital in case there are complications, and although it felt like everything was moving so fast, they were able to fit me into the schedule that same evening.
Michael and I arrived at the hospital a couple of hours before the procedure was going to take place. It was a bit of a whirlwind with what felt like a million people asking me for my medical history and all this activity going on around me. Because a version can be painful and the best chances of success occur when a mom is completely relaxed, I had an epidural put in. Let me just say the experience is a lot different when you aren't distracted by the pain of labor. I barely even remember getting my epidural with Evie, and the whole process felt pretty easy and painless--this time around, I was a ball of nerves and it seemed like it took FOREVER. I was also given a shot of Terbutaline to relax my uterine muscles.
Once I was numb, the doctor started the version. Basically, he used the images on an ultrasound screen to help him try to manually manipulate Juliet into turning. It's a lot of careful pushing and prodding, and I'm told by Michael that it looks very weird. I just stared at the ceiling the entire time, chanting "turn, turn" over and over in my head. I didn't feel any pain, but I could feel the pressure of her being moved around--it's a very odd sensation.
In order to get the best angles to try to manipulate her, the doctor occasionally had me roll slightly onto either my left or right side and finally onto my back. Within a minute or two of that position, all hell pretty much broke loose. Suddenly the ten plus people in my room (that is not even an exaggeration) were scrambling around, and the doctor was explaining to me that Juliet's heart rate had dropped really low and we needed to get to the operating room as a precaution. He was almost positive her heart rate would jump back up before we even got there, but he didn't want to take any chances.
Thankfully the doctor was right and the approximately three minutes it took to get me wheeled into the next room was enough time for Juliet's heart rate to come back up to normal. It was such a relief, and I'm just glad I didn't have enough time to process it all. However, although her heart rate was up, my blood pressure had dropped drastically. They had to pump a few doses of ephedrine into me before it came back up--it felt like it took forever though it probably only took a few minutes. Michael was finally in the room at this point, decked out in his paper scrubs, and I can only imagine what was going through his head.
Once both Juliet and I were stable, the doctor attempted the version once again. We stayed in the operating room for the remainder of the procedure as a precaution, but no more theatrics occurred. Unfortunately, Juliet was being completely stubborn and would not get past laying horizontally. The doctor was able to get her butt up out of my pelvis which is a huge plus, but she just wouldn't turn that last little bit to get head down. The doctor was only willing to try so long before calling it quits. No one wanted a repeat of the earlier drama.
I was wheeled back to my room shortly afterwards, and was ready to wait out the two hours of observation required to make sure both Juliet and I stayed stable after the procedure. The two hours turned into almost six as Juliet wasn't quite ready to stop being a drama queen. Apparently she's an adrenaline junkie, and the three shots of Ephedrine on top of the Terbutaline were enough to keep her heart rate high for a few hours. Poor baby went from low heart rate to high heart rate all in the same day. Thankfully after a few hours of monitoring, her heart rate finally started to slow down and eventually got back to her normal range. After nine hours in the hospital, we were finally able to go home.
It was quite an experience, and not one I'd be willing to go through again during this pregnancy. Every person on the medical staff was awesome and through all the drama and craziness of the evening, I never once lost my cool because I felt completely safe in their hands. I had one moment of pure panic on the way to the potential emergency c-section, but otherwise my nerves were steady. It's amazing what you can learn about yourself in moments of such intensity.
Although I wouldn't attempt another version this pregnancy, if I were ever to become pregnant again and was faced with this option due to a breech baby, I would consider trying it again. I'm just not willing to put my body or Juliet through that stress again so soon after going through this. Even with the heavy disappointment of going through it all and the procedure not being successful, I don't regret doing it. Especially because I am almost certain Juliet turned the rest of the way that night while I was asleep! I'll find out today at my doctor appointment for certain, but either way the whole process was quite a learning experience.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Maternity Pictures
Over the weekend, one of my good friends on Base took some maternity pictures for us. I didn't take maternity pictures while pregnant with Evie and regret it. I somehow lost all my belly bump pictures from that time and have nothing to look back on to remember those months. Here are a few of my favorite shots from the session!
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Friday, October 26, 2012
Photo Goofiness
Every once in awhile, Evie and I will do a little photo shoot of the two of us. It usually includes a couple nice, normal shots. And then the silliness comes out. I figured we needed to do one last one with just the two of us before Juliet is born. Enjoy :)
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| See, we can do normal |
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| Kisses for Baby Sister |
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| Goofy |
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| Our version of the "duck face" |
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| Ahhhh! |
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| Evie's kisses are sometimes slightly abusive |
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Turn, Baby, Turn!
The end is near!
I'm a couple days shy of 37 weeks. and I'm so happy every time I think about it. No matter what, I will be a mother of two within the month! I'm elated and scared out of my mind at the same time. That's normal, right? I'm really only nervous for the adjustment part though. We've been a family of three for almost five years. It's going to be hard on everyone involved to adjust to a new family member. Everything else--even the poopy diapers and impossibly long nights--is actually a bit of a thrill. I am so ready to have a newborn in the house again.
Everything pregnancy-wise is still going well. My body is slowly starting to progress, which I am thankful for. I want my body to have a head start on dilating, etc so when labor finally happens, it hopefully won't be one million hours long. I'm managing all the usual pregnancy complaints pretty well. I won't miss the swollen feet or the inability to move because of this huge basketball stuffed under my shirt, but I'm trying to cherish these last moments of pregnancy. I'm never going to be pregnant again, and it's all a little bittersweet.
I received the best compliment ever while shopping at the Commissary yesterday. A lady shopping behind me stopped to tell me she couldn't even tell I was pregnant until I turned to the side, and the belly was revealed. With only a few weeks of my pregnancy to go, I find that to be quite a compliment. I'm so thankful I'm carrying this pregnancy so well--hopefully that means the pounds will just melt off afterwards!
The one complaint I have pregnancy-wise is that Juliet is breech! It really is just my luck. The entire pregnancy up until about 31 weeks, she was always nestled very low in my pelvis. I rarely felt movement above my belly button, and her hiccups were always extremely low. When I hit 31 weeks, she decided torturing Mommy would be super fun. She'll be head down for about seven to ten days, and then flip to breech. She tends to stay in that position for about a day, and is usually extremely active during that period. And then she flips back to head down. Because I am carrying so compactly and the placement of her hiccups are so discernible, it is very easy for me to tell her position.
At my appointment last week, I mentioned to my doctor that I was pretty sure she had turned to breech the day before. She sent me for an ultrasound for confirmation, and low and behold, Juliet's butt was nestled right down in my pelvis! We talked about my options, and were planning on scheduling a procedure where the doctor manually tries to turn the baby using external manipulation for this week. And then that night, like I figured she would, Juliet turned back to head down. Disaster evaded...or so we thought.
Of course the little stinker stayed in the right position until Tuesday morning. I woke up to hiccups right at my ribcage, and my doctor appointment the next morning confirmed it. She's breech again! Obviously she has enough room to move around yet, but she's been in this position for a few days now--the longest she's stayed breech. I have the external version appointment set for next week, but really hope she turns on her own. I've been trying all the "tricks" to get her to move--a cold pack to make her mad, music and a flashlight to catch her attention, pelvic tilts and sticking my booty up in the air to shift her center of gravity.
Obviously. I'll try anything that has even an inkling of working because I will do anything in my power to avoid a c-section! I know it's not the end of the world if that's the route I end up having to take, but it won't be an option I'll take lightly. I want what's best for the health of Juliet and myself, but I don't necessarily believe having a c-section is the best thing for our health in every situation. Thankfully my doctor is willing to try to manually move her up until my water breaks so we aren't even discussing a scheduled c-section.
So keep your fingers crossed that she turns to head down, and stays!
I'm a couple days shy of 37 weeks. and I'm so happy every time I think about it. No matter what, I will be a mother of two within the month! I'm elated and scared out of my mind at the same time. That's normal, right? I'm really only nervous for the adjustment part though. We've been a family of three for almost five years. It's going to be hard on everyone involved to adjust to a new family member. Everything else--even the poopy diapers and impossibly long nights--is actually a bit of a thrill. I am so ready to have a newborn in the house again.
Everything pregnancy-wise is still going well. My body is slowly starting to progress, which I am thankful for. I want my body to have a head start on dilating, etc so when labor finally happens, it hopefully won't be one million hours long. I'm managing all the usual pregnancy complaints pretty well. I won't miss the swollen feet or the inability to move because of this huge basketball stuffed under my shirt, but I'm trying to cherish these last moments of pregnancy. I'm never going to be pregnant again, and it's all a little bittersweet.
I received the best compliment ever while shopping at the Commissary yesterday. A lady shopping behind me stopped to tell me she couldn't even tell I was pregnant until I turned to the side, and the belly was revealed. With only a few weeks of my pregnancy to go, I find that to be quite a compliment. I'm so thankful I'm carrying this pregnancy so well--hopefully that means the pounds will just melt off afterwards!
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| 36 Week Picture |
At my appointment last week, I mentioned to my doctor that I was pretty sure she had turned to breech the day before. She sent me for an ultrasound for confirmation, and low and behold, Juliet's butt was nestled right down in my pelvis! We talked about my options, and were planning on scheduling a procedure where the doctor manually tries to turn the baby using external manipulation for this week. And then that night, like I figured she would, Juliet turned back to head down. Disaster evaded...or so we thought.
Of course the little stinker stayed in the right position until Tuesday morning. I woke up to hiccups right at my ribcage, and my doctor appointment the next morning confirmed it. She's breech again! Obviously she has enough room to move around yet, but she's been in this position for a few days now--the longest she's stayed breech. I have the external version appointment set for next week, but really hope she turns on her own. I've been trying all the "tricks" to get her to move--a cold pack to make her mad, music and a flashlight to catch her attention, pelvic tilts and sticking my booty up in the air to shift her center of gravity.
Obviously. I'll try anything that has even an inkling of working because I will do anything in my power to avoid a c-section! I know it's not the end of the world if that's the route I end up having to take, but it won't be an option I'll take lightly. I want what's best for the health of Juliet and myself, but I don't necessarily believe having a c-section is the best thing for our health in every situation. Thankfully my doctor is willing to try to manually move her up until my water breaks so we aren't even discussing a scheduled c-section.
So keep your fingers crossed that she turns to head down, and stays!
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Pink & Grey Nursery Reveal
Before we knew if Baby 2.0 was a boy or girl, I started planning the nursery. By the time of the "big reveal" ultrasound, I had a basic plan for the nursery--one for girl, one for boy. The ink had barely dried on the ultrasound pictures before I started making lists and gathering supplies to make my vision of Juliet's nursery a reality.
For the past fifteen week or so, Michael and I have been hard at work getting our little projects done. He was in charge of painting anything that needed painting, and I was in charge of pretty much everything else. After all, it was my vision. Not to mention I loved it!
So here it is. Juliet's pink and grey nursery in all it's glory.
And there you have it! We are very pleased with the end result, and I can't wait to bring Juliet home to it. It's probably my favorite room in the house! It's a very small space with an even smaller closet, but I think I did my vision justice. I'm a little sick of my sewing machine at the moment though so I'm glad it's finally done!
For the past fifteen week or so, Michael and I have been hard at work getting our little projects done. He was in charge of painting anything that needed painting, and I was in charge of pretty much everything else. After all, it was my vision. Not to mention I loved it!
So here it is. Juliet's pink and grey nursery in all it's glory.
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| Don't you just love the stripe? |
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| Used the bones of Evie's old mobile & attached homemade felt creations to add a unique flair |
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| Felt mobile up close |
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| Chevron fabric over a canvas frame, with a handmade felt flower to add a pop |
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| Love the lamp--a gem found at Hobby Lobby |
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| My first attempt at making my own printables turned out well |
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| Handmade "boppy". A tad smaller than the original, but don't you just love the fabric? |
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| Michael painted the crib & I made both the crib skirt & crib sheet |
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| Cloth diaper storage |
And there you have it! We are very pleased with the end result, and I can't wait to bring Juliet home to it. It's probably my favorite room in the house! It's a very small space with an even smaller closet, but I think I did my vision justice. I'm a little sick of my sewing machine at the moment though so I'm glad it's finally done!
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