Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A Philosophical Moment

Do you spend most of your time lounging around, thinking about the meaning of the world and why we're here?  Unless you're Socrates or Aristotle, probably not.  But if you're like me, you most likely have a philosophical moment or two where you spend at least a little time contemplating what life really means, and thinking about the big picture. 

As much as I hated the subject of philosophy in college, I like to think that I've had somewhat of a philosophical year.  At some point in the past twelve months, something just clicked, and I began seeing the world in an entirely different way.

If you know me at all, you know that I'm a planner.  I like making lists, researching something from every angle, and planning in vivid detail for the future.  But as I've gotten older, I've realized how futile all that micro-managing really is.  Honestly, I'm 23 years old.  In the scheme of things, I've barely lived.  Who cares if I wait five years until going to get my Master's Degree if that means I can spend more time with my daughter now?   I squeezed so many major life events--marriage, parenthood, home ownership--into one year that for my sanity, I need to slow down and smell the roses.  And the gardenias.  And the daisies for that matter.

Looking at the bigger picture has helped me realize that I need to enjoy life more.  With Michael joining the Air Force, we have so many opportunities ahead of us to meet new people and experience new things.  With this new outlook, I refuse to let any of those opportunities pass me by.  Whether we end up in sunny Florida, rainy Washington, or somewhere in between, I plan on rejoicing in the fact that an adventure lies in waiting.

I don't know if my time on earth has some divine purpose or if it was just a happenstance of biology, but I do know that it shouldn't be wasted.

I'm not saying I'm throwing my researching and planning tendencies out the window--that would be about next to impossible--but I am working on the new me.  That same new me that said "being fearless" was my New Year's resolution....cross-country road trip anyone?

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