Monday, April 23, 2012

The Most Precious Sound

Today we heard the most beautiful sound in the world.  The sound of Baby 2.0's heartbeat!

I'm officially 10 weeks, 2 days pregnant, and so happy to have made it to this point in the pregnancy.  Hearing the heartbeat is such a pivotal moment because the chance of miscarriage has now dropped dramatically.  I finally feel like this baby is really going to be a part of our family in a few months.  The year of heartache and repeated disappointment finally has taken a turn for the better.

My pregnancy has been going well.  I can definitely attest to the fact that morning sickness is a serious misnomer.  All-day sickness would be a better term.  I cannot wait to stop taking my progesterone supplement and for the first trimester to be over so I can finally find some relief.  It's worth it--but I am not a fan of feeling like a zombie every day.

We're having a Nuchal Scan in a couple of weeks.  Basically it's an ultrasound coupled with blood work that pre-screens for Down Syndrome and other genetic defects.  We're having the test done mainly because insurance pays for it, and for a bonus ultrasound.  I can't wait to see Baby 2.0 actually looks like a baby instead of the small fetal pole and gestational sac we saw at the last ultrasound.  It's amazing the difference six weeks will make. 

So we're excited.  Not so scared anymore, though I'm sure I'll feel even more reassured after we have the ultrasound!

Monday, April 16, 2012

Just Call Me Dorothy

If you watched the news at all over the weekend, you probably know that the Midwest had some pretty nasty storms.  You might have seen pictures similar to this one:

Yeah, we live in Wichita.  Right in the middle of that "life-threatening" area highlighted in dark red. 

All day long, I kept my eye on the Weather Channel, hoping the storm would dissipate a little.  For one, I wasn't eager to have a tornado take my house away.  I may hate my house a little right now, but I didn't want to see it blow away.  Secondly, we have a leaky basement with mold.  I wasn't eager to spend the night with floaties on, trying not to breathe in the nasty stuff.

Unfortunately, a tornado did hit Wichita.  Although the Base across the street suffered a little damage, and the Quik Trip a half mile up the road was almost destroyed, Base Housing was spared.  It couldn't have gotten much closer than that.  Thankfully there weren't any fatalities. 

Apparently, May is the big month for tornadoes here in Kansas.  So it looks like we have another couple months of this weather to look forward to.  Better keep that emergency kit stocked and ready.

Monday, April 9, 2012

The Sex Debate

You have no idea how glad I am that the sex of Baby 2.0 is decided by a little tiny sperm, and not by me.

One of the most exciting parts about having a baby is finding out whether it will be a boy or girl.  For the weeks leading up to the big ultrasound, everyone chimes in with their opinions one way or another.  They weigh in with old wives tales or just personal feelings.  I love daydreaming about having another little girl to dress up in pretty clothes or a boy that looks just like Michael.  I don't have the patience nor feel the moment would be more special if we waited for the birth of the baby to find out the sex.

But I almost wish I did.

Michael and I aren't planning on having more than two children.  Back before we had Evie, I always said I wanted at least three but probably four children, and Michael was always pretty firm on two.  Once I became a parent, I realized that if I wanted to keep my sanity and any semblance of organization in my life, two children were probably my limit too.  I love kids, but I rank my sanity pretty high up there too.

So since we are planning on Baby 2.0 being our last child, I have very mixed feelings about the sex of the baby.  Of course what I want most is a healthy baby.  But beyond that, I would love to have another little girl.  I love dresses and girly things.  And girls are familiar to me.  When I think about having a son and him becoming a teenager someday, I can't help but shudder in fear.  I can handle menstruation and birth control and shrilly female moments of drama because I've lived those moments.  Not so sure about wet dreams and all those fun male things.  Oh my god, that's so scary.  But I know having a son would open up a whole new world to me, and would brighten my life so much.  So although I'd choose girl over boy if it were up to me, I'll be happy either way.

What really makes me nervous about finding out the sex of Baby 2.0 is the rest of my little family.  I'm sure if you asked Michael, he'd say the same as me but in reverse.  He wants a healthy baby above all, but would really love a son.  Of course he'd be okay with another girl--it wouldn't be his first rodeo.  But what guy doesn't want a son?  I'll be so disappointed for him if Baby 2.0 is a girl. 

Evie, on the other hand, will not be happy with either boy or girl.  She still refuses to even consider the fact that Baby 2.0 could be a boy.  This is how a typical conversation goes with her involving the baby:

Evie:  What's my baby sister doing now, Mommy?
Me:   She's growing super fast so she can meet you.  But you know the baby might be a brother, right?
Evie:  But it might be a sister.
Me:  Yes, I know.  But the baby might be a boy.
Evie:  I think it's a girl.
Me:  Yes,  I realize this.  But what if the baby is a boy?
Evie:  I think it's a girl.

It goes on and on and on.  She absolutely will not budge.  I asked Evie if she will still love the baby if it's a brother, and she said no.  This honestly worries me because she is stubborn like both her parents, and I could see her being so mad if Baby 2.0 is a boy that she really will refuse to acknowledge it.  Yes, I'm sure eventually she would get over it.  She loves our friends' little son.  But she wants a sister to share all her stuff with so badly that I think she will be deeply disappointed.

And therein lies my dilemma.

I'll be disappointed for Michael if Baby 2.0 is a girl because this is his last shot at having a boy.  I know how badly it would have hurt me if we hadn't ever had a girl so I would feel so sad for all that could have been.  But I know that Evie will be so disappointed if Baby 2.0 is a boy.  She wants a sister so badly that she won't even think about the alternative.  I know that eventually she would love him regardless, but the loss of a sister bond would break my heart a little too.

At this point, I almost wish I were pregnant with twins--one boy and one girl.  I can't even believe I just said that.  But it would solve this little dilemma.  Too bad I've already had two ultrasounds and they double checked extra carefully both times to make sure only one baby was present.  

So many thanks to that tiny sperm that took on this burden.  I am so glad I am not you.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

A Week Without Sleep

Pregnant women should always be allowed as much sleep as they want.  Anyone want to inform Evie of this?

What a week.  Poor Evie came down with a stomach bug on Sunday night, and was up vomiting for a few hours.  I had only fallen asleep about four hours before she woke up, and was awake for about the next four so by the time morning finally rolled around, I was so exhausted.  Thankfully Michael took over for awhile so I could catch another couple hours of sleep.

Although she got over the bug pretty quickly, Evie still felt a little crummy at bed time.  After listening to her cry in her sleep, I let her slip into bed with me for awhile since Michael is working the night shift this week.  Since infancy, she hasn't slept with me outside of vacations or hotel stays.  And I remember why.

She kicks when she sleeps.  A lot.  Ouch.

After being woken up about fifty times in what felt like five minutes from her kicking me, I finally carried her sleeping butt back to bed.  Only a few hours later, I woke up with chest pains that lasted a few hours.  Another sleeping fail.

It was smooth sailing on Tuesday night.  I probably got close to eleven hours of sleep.  I still felt sleep deprived yesterday, but didn't feel as much like a zombie as I had the two previous days.

And then last night happened.  If I didn't love Evie so much, I would have ran out into the streets, screaming, never to return.

For some random reason, the power went out around 4:30 in the morning.  We run small fans in our room for white noise so as soon as the power went out Evie woke up.  And of course started yelling because her nightlight was also off. 

Every time I started to doze off, Evie would yell to me about something.  First, it was that she couldn't sleep with just her flashlight on and no fan.  That problem was easily fixed after the power finally came back on.  Then she thought she saw a bug on her ceiling.  I checked--nothing.  Then she came out yelling because the bug was on her.   Again, nothing.  Then she wanted a drink of water.  Lastly, she yelled because the bug was in her bed.  Oh. My. God.  I finally just let her come sleep in my bed, knowing that she would probably kick me every five minutes, but five minutes of sleep was better than none.

I didn't have to worry about Evie kicking me though.  Because she never fell asleep!  I kept dozing off, and she kept waking me up to talk.  "Want to hear a story, Mommy" or "Let me tell you a joke".  The last time she woke me up yelling "Daddy is home!"  Yep, she was up until Michael got home shortly after seven. 

I cannot believe she didn't fall back asleep.  Especially because by the time Michael put her back to bed and he came to bed himself (not after Evie came out telling him there was a roly poly in her room!), it was almost eight o'clock.  And I had to get up at 8:30 to get ready for my first ob/gyn appointment. 

It wasn't without a little satisfaction that I woke her snoring butt up a little while later.  At least I wasn't the only one with bags under my eyes.  I hope we both sleep like rocks tonight.  Thankfully Michael is suppose to come home early so if she decides to wake up again, at least he can deal with her!

Monday, April 2, 2012

What's the Season?

How much are you all loving this awesome weather? I can barely believe that we had temperatures in the mid 80's in the last weekend of March!  I'm still getting used to being in a warmer state.  Back in Wisconsin, we sometimes still have snow for weeks.  Evie has been asking me if it's spring or if it's summer.  I'm not really sure what to tell her.

We took advantage of the awesome weather over the weekend, and spent a lot of time outdoors.  On Saturday we spent most of the day with two families that we are super close to here. We spent a few hours fishing at the Base ponds which was a blast.  All the little girls with their pink fishing poles, catching tiny fish after tiny fish.  The adults didn't really have time to fish because they were too busy releasing all the fish the  girls caught.

After fishing, we all grilled out and then topped the evening off with s'mores around a fire.  Yummo.  I love s'mores, and am not embarrassed to admit that was already our second night this month eating them.  How can you not with this weather? 

On Sunday we went to Michael's Squadron's Easter Egg hunt.  There aren't that many Squadron events for the whole family, and it involved free candy and ice cream so we couldn't pass it up.

Evie was disappointed that she didn't find the "golden egg" that would have won her an additional gift, but she was pretty happy about the number of eggs she managed to snag.  We have another egg hunt next weekend so I think she's going to get her fill of candy.

This week looks like it's going to be a bit colder (in the 60s, the horror) and wetter (as if I really wanted to deal with a horribly leaking basement again) so I'm glad we soaked up the weather when we could.  Hope you all did too!